Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I have complete contempt for traitorism

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A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I see through liars

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

Watch: Netanyahu's First Remark After US Bombs Iran Nuclear Sites - NDTV

I understand how hurricane paths work

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I have complete contempt for fakery

Aut adipisci dolorum ut aliquam consequuntur quas.

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Pamela Bach’s heartbreaking final message to her daughter revealed three months after her death - Page Six

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Gunther says ‘the air got sucked out of the room’ after beating Jey Uso for World Title - Cageside Seats

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I can read

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I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

Fear of Uncertainty Held S&P 500 Back From Record. Now It’s Real - Bloomberg.com

I don’t cotton to rapists

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

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I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

Red Dead Redemption star says he "possibly misled some people" but insists "exciting" news is still on the way - Eurogamer

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have a reading level above third grade

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

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I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

What are your thoughts on a Russian poetry prize banning entries from transgender people? Why is Russia so transphobic?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I actually pay taxes

Why paracetamol – one of the world’s most common painkillers – works - The Jerusalem Post

I can count

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

A Biologist Spotlights The World’s Most Aggressive Bird. Hint: It’s Flightless, It’s Not The Ostrich, And It’s Been Known To Kill People - Forbes

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

What is a good way to conduct an interview?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I don’t buy bullshit

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday